Okay, so things haven’t been too good lately, and I realized after re-reading my entries that they have been, let’s say, depressing. Two deaths and a funeral don’t make for feel-good reading. And while I feel the need to send some cheerful tidings everyone’s way, I must fill you in on the latest not-so-pleasant thing that’s going on with me. But I promise this entry has a happy ending.
I’ve been walking around for the past two days with a swollen face and an easily mistaken black eye. And no the blog isn’t titled, The Fight to Live, although I giggle as I write this because that was the original title. Now back to my jacked-up mug…I had a dentist appointment Friday morning at 7:30 to go get a root canal, but my tooth wasn’t hurting, and I knew if I came in to work late I’d have to either take a shorter lunch or stay late to make up the time. I wasn’t about to do either. I had places to go and people to see. Since the library book sale was going on at lunch and Shakespeare in the Park was that evening, I bailed on the dentist. At the time it seemed like the right decision. At 7:30 Friday night, it felt like a very bad decision.
Mike and I ordered takeout that night, and as I put a fork full of greasy, gooey, cheesy, hot pizza in my mouth, I felt a throb, then a thump, and then a second thump. And within seconds a volcanic headache erupted. Oh boy, was all I could think. I sat there for a second considering that since it was the hot sensation that ignited my tooth’s fury, perhaps as quickly as it came on, it would go away. Um, no! Long story short, the pain lasted the rest of Friday, Saturday, and I woke up with a swollen grimace on Sunday, which has yet to deflate. But the good news is that I have an appointment at 1:45 today so hopefully I won’t be looking like a domestic violence victim much longer.
So on to happier thoughts. My sister and I have been talking. For those of you who have read excerpts from my book or who know me, you know this is a HUGE milestone. My sister and I haven’t exactly seen eye to eye much of our lives. She’s eight years older than me and I think I’ve always been a pest to her. When I was little all I wanted was her attention, for her to love me, take care of me, and be my big sis. But she wasn’t having it. As we got older I think we both tried from time to time to build a relationship but because we never really had a foundation, things always seemed to crumble. A few years ago—and yes I said years ago—we got into an argument that left us heated, offended, and hurt. My sister is probably one of the most stubborn people I know, so though I got over our tiff and was ready to move forward, she wasn’t having any of that either. But after the death of our Aunt Karen I think we both realized life is short, and that we do love each other. I couldn’t be happier because I’ve missed my sister. So, looks like I’ll be working on number 20 from my Happiness list (work to fix any strained relationships I have—my sister is at the top of this list) sooner than I thought I’d be. I guess it’s true that blessings come with calamity.
Yesterday when I got home from work Mike was already there. As I pulled in the driveway, I noticed he had pulled the weeds in our flower beds, mowed the front and back lawn, took his nifty blower and blew away the leaves, and was about to cut the weeds. As I sat in my car I thought whatever it is that has gotten into him, I pray it stays. Now Mike is a worker. He goes to work every day, going above and beyond all the time. And as prior entries have attested, he takes great care of our animals. But Mike, although quite a strapping man, doesn’t do heat, at least not without complaining. So when I pulled up and saw him, drenched t-shirt and all, with a wide, endearing smile lining his face I wondered what could have normally “Cranky Lawn Mike” chipper?
At the time I had his mom on the phone so when I got out of the car I handed my cell to Mike so that he could say hi. I walked into the house noticing it was cleaned up, the animals looked happy as clams, and Mike had even fixed the busted pipe in the ceiling of the kitchen. My heart fluttered with admiration. But what really caused my typically lackadaisical husband to get jiggy with it, bust a move, and straight up rock his chores, and do it all with a smile?
But then suddenly something came to mind. Every day I have Mike read my entries out loud. Usually while I’m packing lunches, he’s standing with my laptop reciting my words back to me. I love it because I get to hear what I wrote, which always sounds different coming out of someone else’s mouth, Mike always laughs or sighs in the right places, and he offers suggestions (not too many) and validation, which at this stage of the game (with my submission situation) is much appreciated. I didn’t really think he was paying too much attention to what he was reading, just fulfilling his husbandly duty, but maybe—just maybe—I was wrong!
Mike ran back outside, put his tools away, came back in, and said he’s going to refill the litter boxes, the sincere smile on his face causing me to smile (number 5 on my Jim list). But that wasn’t all. He also covered number 7, which is to smile; number 9, which is to do your chores with a smile; and number 10, which is to make sacrifices for others. Mike makes his way back in, goes downstairs to the basement and starts working on the litter boxes. Our doorbell rang, and it was our neighbor Chuck. He asks if Mike is home because he needs Mike’s muscles (don’t we all?). I yelled for Mike, who ran over to help Chuck open his garage door (Chuck has a bad back). We eat dinner, and after finishing Mike said, “I’m going to go out and help Chuck cut his grass; he’s struggling out there.” And sure enough he cut Chuck’s back yard, and then cut the weeds for him. I stood in the window watching him and thinking that is exactly what my dad would have done. I was proud,!
I think the moral of this story is that what we say, how we act, and what we do affects others. Even when we think people aren’t watching, and aren’t listening, sometimes they are. Maybe my entries have inspired Mike to make some changes of his own, to be happy to be alive. And perhaps yesterday was his Kevin Spacey moment to pay it forward to me and Chuck. Whatever the reason, he brought a smile to both our faces and I totally dig it.
Only an hour and a half left until relief. Today IS a good day.
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